The Heart Cases: I Am Not The Rapist’s Child

 In Abortion, Adoption, faith, news

Wow! I hate that phrase. “Rapist’s child”, “rapist’s baby”, “rape baby”, or “product of rape”—all equally despicable, yet intentional, pejoratives used by abortion activists and politicians to debase those conceived in such horrid violence. As if these revilers had any control over the circumstances of their own conception, they stand as judge and executioner of human beings with the exact same cellular makeup.

Do we refer to children as the “drug dealer’s child” or the “adulterer’s child?”  President Obama’s alcoholic father was married multiple times. In fact, his father was married to two different women concurrently. Do we call Obama the “bigamist’s child” or the “alcoholic’s child”? That would be horrible. Granted, people hold various views of our Commander-in-Chief, but who would call him the Abandoned-in-Chief because of his deadbeat dad (no matter the wishful dreams he had of his father)?

Yup. This is me at 6 weeks old being held by my mom for the first time. Andrea and Henry Bomberger went on to adopt 9 more (supposedly "unwanted") children.

Yup. This is me at 6 weeks old being held by my mom for the first time. My amazing parents, Andrea and Henry Bomberger, went on to adopt 9 more (supposedly “unwanted”) children.

When do we ever define an innocent child by the crimes of either parent? This is only necessary to those whose ideology demands the dehumanization of that life to justify killing via abortion. It assuages those who demand that certain human life have zero civil rights.

The Civil Rights Act of 1964, celebrated as one of America’s most pivotal moments, was just long overdue. Most don’t realize that it is nearly a mirror copy of the Republican-only passed Civil Rights Act of 1875, championed by famed abolitionist (and my hero) Frederick Douglass. The act was later ruled, in 1883, unconstitutional by the Supreme Court. (They have often been Supremely wrong!) February is Douglass’ birth-month as well as President Abraham Lincoln’s. Both men changed the trajectory of our nation’s civil rights. Lincoln’s conscience was reshaped by Douglass, a man whose name is synonymous with abolition (despite Steven Spielberg’s grotesque omission of him in his award-winning eponymous film). Lincoln’s heart was moved by the eloquence and conviction of a man who wasn’t even considered human. The leader of the Party created to abolish slavery was compelled to rethink his views of humanity and equality by a former slave who abortion activists, today, would call a “rapist’s child.”

Frederick Douglass was born as a result of the rape of his biological mother, a slave, by her slave master. But Douglass is defined by his greatness, his achievements, by something other than the crime that caused his conception. He wasn’t the “slave master’s child” but a resilient human being who fought to ensure the dignity of all human life. He was a man who rose from the seemingly impossible to be an incomparable orator, author, newspaper publisher, women’s rights advocate, ambassador, abolitionist, and…Presidential adviser.

We all have that capacity within us. We’re all created equal, which means the beautiful possibility that is within that child who was “planned” is no different than that which was instilled in me despite my violent conception. My biological mother was strength personified. She chose to be stronger than her circumstances. I am beyond grateful for her courage and the incredible gift of life and love she gave to me, especially through adoption. And as I’ve discovered by talking to rape survivors across the country at events on college campuses, in churches, in schools, and in adoption-related conferences, there is a common thread. Children conceived in rape are often considered by their biological mothers as the only redemption amidst the horrific devastation of rape.
According to a published study* in the Journal of American Obstetrics and Gynecology an estimated 50% of women who conceive after being raped choose abortion, but that’s not the end "YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR CIRCUMSTANCES" by The Radiance Foundationof the story. Surprisingly to some, 32.2% choose to continue their pregnancy and parent the child with 5.9% opting to make an adoption plan, according to the same study. Nearly 40% choose life! I continue to meet these women, both post-abortive (who often express their regret) and those who gave birth to their child. To add a little more context, abortions due to rape constitute 1% of all abortions nationwide. But these are stories worth knowing, perspectives demanding more than a soundbite or the exploitation by a “pro-choice” politician trying to scare the public into embracing abortion.

Many call these situations the hard cases. I call them the heart cases, because it takes more than numbers to sway people to reconsider what society offers as “healing” to women so horrifically violated. It takes sharing the other side of the story, showing people the tangible reality of that 1% and the beautiful Possibility that every life possesses. The violence of abortion, on both the child and the mother, does nothing to punish the rapist. According to many post-abortive rape survivors I’ve talked to, it doesn’t erase the emotional or physical trauma either.

I am not the “rapist’s child”. I was her child. I am God’s child. I’m one of thousands, every year, given the opportunity to live, love and redeem what the rapist tried to destroy. Our stories are full of hope, full of love, full of purpose. And, when given the chance to share our experiences, we change people’s hearts and minds about the heart cases proving that triumph can rise from tragedy.




*Just because something is published in a peer-reviewed journal doesn’t mean it isn’t seriously biased. The researchers in the Rape-related Pregnancy study may have quantitative accuracy, but their qualitative assessment is absurd. This research is also cited on the website of ACOG, The American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists, dated 2011. Authors of the study claim that “rape-related pregnancy occurs with significant frequency”, while indicating that an estimated 5% of rape victims conceive. There’s a serious flaw with their numbers though. It would mean that 640,000 women would have been raped. Five percent (the “national rape-related percentage”) of 642,020 is 32,101, yet rape reported to the FBI at the time of this 1996 study was 97,470 for 1995. Even the National Crime Victimization Survey puts the estimated total of “completed rapes” of females at 402,000 for 1995. This is not per victim, either. This is the total number of victimizations, which means one person could have been victimized multiple times. This also doesn’t always include actual sexual intercourse. Sometimes, non-sexual objects are used in these horrific attacks. Nonetheless, these “unbiased” researchers then further exploit the tragedy of rape by declaring that rape-related pregnancies are “a cause of many unwanted pregnancies”. The 1996 study—the only one of its kind–estimated that there were 32,101 of these pregnancies each year, of which 11.8% were miscarried, leaving 28,313 viable pregnancies. There were 6,240,000 pregnancies that year in the US, of which 16% were miscarried, leaving 5,241,600 viable pregnancies. According to the CDC, 49% were deemed “unintended”. So out of 2,568,384 “unintended” pregnancies, 28,313 rape-related pregnancies make up 1.1% of those. How in the world does that constitute “a cause of many unwanted pregnancies”? The study further indicates that 50% of pregnancies resulting in rape, or 14,156 viable pregnancies, were aborted. In 1996, when this research was published, there were 1,365,700 legal abortions according to Guttmacher Institute. Children conceived in rape, then aborted, amounted to 1% of all abortions. Yet these heart cases are used to justify 100% of abortions.

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Showing 28 comments
  • Luis Howard for the Howard Family

    JMJWow! Ryan, you never fail to impress! God bless you! Keep up the great work! We pray for you, along with other pro lifers, every single day!

    • The Radiance Foundation

      Hi Howard Family…Thank you for you encouragement! What a blessing to be able to lift each other up in prayer!

  • Kathleen

    This is a wonderful, passionate article- so right on! I am so thankful you could articulate these truths in such a powerful way. I hope this article goes around the world and gives hope and promise to so may who have been beaten down and their spirits destroyed in a wicked society. Thanks so much for sharing your life with us.

    • The Radiance Foundation

      Thank you Kathleen. We’re just thankful for Divine downloads that enable us to express our passionate worldview the way we do! May it go far and wide. Amen to that!

  • Tracey

    I never knew there were people like you and your organization until tonight. I was raped 20 years ago and struggled to know what to do when I found out I was pregnant. The thought that kept coming to me was that there were 2 victims that night, the baby and me. I started to think, “If another girl had been raped that night, would killing her help me heal?” If not, then why would killing the baby that was absolutely innocent of any wrongdoing be right, fair, or helpful? I knew then that I would choose life. Then, I needed to decide if I could keep him. I didn’t know if I could love him as I should. A dear friend told me that my child would be a blessing to me whether I gave him up or raised him. I still didn’t know what to do, though. After I gave birth and saw him, I knew that I could love him. I wanted to do what was best for him, though. I tried to decide if putting him into a loving family for adoption or raising him myself was the best option for him. I had to decide if it was better to let him go and hope he never found out about his conception or raise him and make sure he knew that I loved him despite it all. I choose to love him and raise him. It was a choice to love him, and it wasn’t easy at first. But God has truly blessed me through my son. Like you, he has excelled academically, athletically, socially, spiritually, and is a constant source of joy and pride. He is the tool that God used to heal me. That night is a rarely remembered lifetime ago, but my son is a constant gift that I don’t think I could have lived without. Those phrases that you spoke of have always hurt me and hurt me for him. I am so thankful that you are getting the word out about using such ugly words to describe such beautiful people.

    • TrudyTruthTeller

      Yes, but aren’t you grateful that you had a choice? Kudos to you that you were able to love a baby that was was the result of a violent attack, but would you deny that choice to another victim?

      • LeeAnna Hawk

        Remember the babies are also victims and they are not given a chance to choose life; should they be denied that choice?

        • TrudyTruthTeller

          No baby.

        • TrudyTruthTeller

          There is no baby. Perhaps you failed basic biology in high school, but a fetus is not a baby.

  • Rebekah

    Beautifully written article. Cannot tell you how much this touched my heart. Twenty four years have passed since I was raped and found out I was pregnant. My daughter has been a blessing to me since the moment I found out I was carrying her. To watch her grow into an amazing young lady has been wonderful. Our story has not ended but instead is taking a turn that is even more beautiful to me. God bless you in all you do.

  • mimi

    Rapists children, product of rape, are just that. They were created through rape. Which is why some rapists who have other children via consensual acts do not suffer with the same label.
    Bigamy, alcoholism, pedophilia and murder doesn’t produce children, outside sexual contact consensual or otherwise does.

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